Expectations from children

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This is a painful truth of a parent’s life. All parents that I know of expect all their children to be successful and happy and caring and well mannered and obedient as if they were made to order. My parents expected me to master of all and I resented it and now when I am a parent I want my children to be good in studies and extracurricular activities. Even if one child is doing well in life and the other is not doing so well why do parents keep wishing the other one will pick up someday and be successful.
I don’t think they are selfish, or they want something from them, they just want children to learn from parent’s experience and not by their own mistakes. I wasn’t fond of eating veggies in my childhood or drinking milk and my mother had to force me now I expect my children to understand the importance of a balanced diet. I sure understand what my mother went through while bringing me up when I have to go through the same troubles.
Reading books about parenting by leading psychiatrists don’t help when you have to practically face your own child. I have my doubts about children of all psychoanalysts being perfect. Housewives make good mothers, not all of them, same about working mothers. If certain qualities were required for being a good parent then why is it that two children of the same set of parents living in the same environment so different from each other?
I would love to hear from a 100% satisfied parent or a child. There are if’s and but’s always. I used to my ask my kids when they were small what sort of mother will they prefer anybody from my relatives, friends, or anybody they knew of they would think for a while and then say no you are fine I am sure if I was asked about kids if I wanted my kids to be like somebody else’s kids I will prefer to have my own kids any day.
There is a story about a village where everybody was unhappy and prayed to get rid of their troubles. One day a voice from the sky asked them to bring their miseries and problems in a bundle on a moonless night to the village temple and at midnight exchange their bundles of miseries. All of them brought their own bundles back. We love our own problems, joys and blessings howsoever hard we may complain. Children are God’s blessings and we should count and enjoy our blessings.

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Filed under Children, Expectations, Me, Parenting